Blackout

The fetal position,

Is the only escape I have to fight my inner demons,

As I tremble against my breasts, while the voices in my head

Whispers crybabycrybaby, the sweat of my flesh recites

The words of my beaten heart.

My knees are weak, my lungs reject my breath, my chest tightens,

I howl in pain, my mind races like a hamster on a wheel.

My loved ones scream Relax, Stop, Breathe in, Breathe out, as if my brain

Can process the four phrases of hell. My tears burn like the ring of fire,

Dilating my pupils, as I withdraw from reality,

 

My thoughts repeat the lyrics of my fractured soul,

                        Selfish

                              I don’t care

                                            Annoying

                                                     Dramatic

Is the song that sings to my cognition; it is no lullaby,

The melody upsets my stomach, leaving me to cringe on the cold wooden floor.

The room is spinning, my eyes are rolling back, my hands are numb,

My shirt is drenched in my fluids, my veins burst on my delicate neck.

The only thing that’s keeping me sane is the goose bumps running down my back,

My head lies on the palm of my hands, and all that I have left to see is darkness…

 

Where am I?

Is there anyone here?

Hello?

I run into the murky room, my body descends beneath the hardwood gaps,

It’s too late, I cannot be saved,

I kiss my forehead goodbye.

 

-Isis R.

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